The real world is where dreams die and where your car can be
repossessed when you're just running in for a pack of Merits. In the
real world, it helps to have a good credit score, a nearby Planned
Parenthood, and a sense of humor because life is going to kick you in
the twins over and over whether you cry about it or not.
The real world is also a television show on MTV where no one pays a
bill, everyone has a cool name and group sex is easy to come by.
Your inner child is the voice inside that wants you to quit your
soul numbing groomer job and play with crayons all day. Your inner
child wants you to trade your sensible Rav4 for a scooter and your suit and tie for a velcro onesie. Basically, your inner child is Uncle
Tim, without the soul patch and alcoholism.
Your inner child is always going to be your best compass, unless of course he's asking you to breast feed.
The freeway is the perfect place to express your anger, because you
don't have to spend Christmas with the guy in the left lane or ask for
a raise from the lady driving the RAV4. You're not going to get
your nose broken on the 405, no matter how many obscenities you drop.
Road rage is better than bar fights and custody battles, mainly because of the insurance coverage and locked door protection.
