Daily Fucking Thought

Tattoos

Tattoos are a good idea if you want to be easily fingered in a bank robbery or need to affiiate with the Mafia Mexicana in the penitentiary.  Tattoos also make sense if you are anxious for a little Hepatitis-C or don't want to get into Jewish heaven.

All of the cons are worth it, though, if you want the world to know how much you love butterflies, now and when you're 79.

The Youngest You'll Ever Be

Look in the mirror - this is the youngest you're ever going to be.  These are the fewest liver spots and the least unwanted hair you're ever going to have.  Soon you're going to be injecting your face with fat from your own bottom just to feel sex-worthy to store clerks and Pastor Todd.

So, go out and seize the day!

Choosing Friends

Cultivating and maintaining friendships is a societal norm that is hard to avoid unless you're okay with co-worker's constant pity.  Put great thought into friend choices because no one wants to be called in the middle of the night when a friend needs a ride to the vet, again.

A married friend is ideal, as are those with a large, close family that lives in the vicinity.  Look for those who are emotionally stable or closed off, those without pets or medical conditions that require injections and those who have reliable transportation and no DUI's.