Daily Fucking Thought

Cold Turkey

Going cold turkey is the only way to quit an addiction, especially if you're not a pussy or your Keno money gets stolen.  Dealing with a week or two of heavy sweating is better than spending years twelve-stepping in church basements, unless you're into coffee and co-dependence.

Cold turkey is also a good name for a garage band or nickname for your step-mother.

Successful Job Interviews

A successful job interview means you've sold yourself well and that the armpit Botox worked.  Your actual qualifications mean very little, because in the end, the most qualified person doesn't always get the job.  Sometimes the most qualified person wears too much musk, has adult braces or is ethnic.

Just remember to bring your resume and not to show any boob crack, because people don't like to think about sex while wearing business casual. 

Exploders Versus Imploders

Exploders are easy to recognize because when they reach their breaking point, tchotchkes fly and ear drums break.  Imploders are more difficult to spot unless they happen to be huffers and puffers or heavy sweaters. 

In the now, people tend to dislike exploders unless they like drama or have low self-esteem and think they deserve the abuse.  But imploders drop dead in line at the grocery store and get aggressive cancers without any family history.  Since you can't win, the best solution is to become numb.