Prove Yourself

When you're wearing pants, no one can see the size of your penis, unless it's windy or you're wearing leggings.  In order to prove you've got a big one, use a large, SAT-worthy vocabulary and treat waitresses like servants.  If someone treats you as a lesser-than, make sure to cut straight to the core, ridiculing his adopted children or his wife's saddle bags. 

If you have a small one, heed the same advice, just use more swear words and drink more to dull the pain. 

Comments

[Hollywood Phony]

I feel this is directed at me.